BRITISH NEWS
The latest News from Home and Abroad of interest to
Brits Abroad.
THE GREAT BRITISH FRY-UP GETS PRAISE FROM TODAYS TRAVELLERS FROM AROUND THE WORLD.
The British fry-up has long been considered the bane of British cooking. There isn’t another country in the world where you can find endless High street cafes and quickly order a plate of egg, sausage, bacon, chips and beans, two slices and a cup of tea, all for a mere few pounds. But, and this is a big but (not the North American type of big butt) but a but that has surprised even the most ardent supporter of British food. The British type of cafe fry-up served all day long has fast become one of the most sought after meals visitors to Britain look for, according to the British Tourist Association and their annual tourist polls of who's doing what and why in Britain. And if you haven’t been home to Britain lately let me tell you the meal is no longer a pile of food, quick fried and served on a cold plate. The fry-up has gone up-scale. Corner cafes have changed their image to the Bistro type restaurants of the world and serve the almighty British meal (chips with everything) in such a way that you’ll be pleased to pay the £5.99 with two slices and a cup of tea extra! Young people the world over seek a good quick ‘full’ meal served in a clean presentable type of ‘Bistro’ and find the English banger, the full rasher meaty English bacon, our real honest country eggs, our perfected chips, and our tomatoey but not over-cooked baked beans to be the meal of choice. Fast foods are popular everywhere you go, and are just that, fast and good. Fancy restaurants with excellent food will hose you for £40 excluding wine, but the new British Bistro with its improved fry-up has fast become the travellers choice of cheap, honest, well cooked, good food. Only the British pub food comes close. So all you put-downers of British food, take note, British food, the way we've liked it for years, and now the way the world likes it, is back!
BRITAIN TO STAGGER (YES 'STAGGER') CLOSING HOURS FOR PUBS, CLUBS, AND BARS.
As from 11 pm November 24th (The US Thanksgiving Day!) upto 70,000 British pubs, clubs, and bars that have obtained the appropriate licence may extend their closing hours from 11 pm to midnight, 1 am, or longer. This will stop the collective fighting that takes place in pub related areas where all the drunks spew onto the pavement all at once at 11.pm. Now they'll be staggering home at various times much like the old plea where we were all asked to stagger working hours to avoid clogged rush-hours! Obviously many people are unhappy about this new 'down-it til dawn' policy of drinking, but the experts say little will change.
YOUR OLD AGE PENSION WILL NOT KICK IN UNTIL YOU REACH 67 SAY PENSIONS COMMISSION
The date hasn’t been set yet but the UK State Pension will not kick in until you have reached 67. This is likely to come into force around 2020 but any new government might bring that forward to 2016. This means that anyone now under 50 will not start drawing their old age pension until they reach 67. The reasons for this are many, but none are surprising. Firstly we’re all living longer, by as much as 10 years longer since the 1960’s. A lot of us are still working at 65 and want to continue to do so. Professions and skilled trades are desperate for people ‘with experience and old school training’ say the Pensions Commission to fill jobs the new graduate just has not been properly trained for. Nurses and teachers have to go beyond their own personal belief that they have a special ‘vocational call’ to do what they’re doing, and not opt out of ‘upgrading and new systems training,’ the Pensions Commission advises. And last but not least say the Commission is that pensions are costing more to pay out than what taxes bring in. As in the USA an imbalance is staring the UK government in the face just 30 years away. Along with the new higher retirement age comes a ‘voluntary savings & retirement’ scheme to be run by the UK government, similar to the excellent one in force in Canada. The UK version will allow a person to opt out over its inaugural years, but after about 10 years it should become compulsory. Some interesting figures: by 2020 over 25% of the population of the UK will be over 70, with another 25% at school. That leaves a mere 50% of the population left to do all the work and pay all the taxes! Moral of this story? Start a savings plan yourself NOW because you’ll need it when you retire.
TONY BLAIR LOSES HIS BILL TO GET 90 DAY DETENTION FOR SUSPECTED TERRORISTS.
Tony Blair suffered his first ever loss on any issue he has ever put before the Commons. He wanted a 90 day detention for terror suspects but it was defeated 322 to 291 which places 49 of his own Labour MP's in opposition. A further vote did agree on extending the 14 day detention to 28 days, voting 323 to 290 in favour. For the first time Blair seemed to be at total odds against public opinion. The British public do not want to go as far as the US with 'special' prisons and endless detention for suspects, yet he failed to listen to his advisers or read the Editorials in all of Britain's leading newspapers.
ONLY ENGLISH MP's SHOULD VOTE ON ENGLISH ISSUES SAY TORY HOPEFUL DAVID DAVIS.
Tory hopeful David Davis; being suggested as the next Tory leader in the upcoming Tory leadership fight, suggests that only English MP's should vote on English issues, excluding MP's for Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland. Trouble with that say many MP's is that we could see hordes of kilted warriors trying to attack the lower counties, or worse still Northern Ireland being intimidated into handing over power to Ireland proper! No telling what the Welsh may get up to from Wales!
OUR IMAGE OF DIFFERENT CULTURES IS ALL WRONG SAY EXPERTS.
The mental image we have about people of other races and cultures can be totally misleading, states a report in Science Magazine. Research across 49 nationalities involving thousands of people was recently completed and the results are quite disturbing. The English are thought of by most people to be ‘stiff’ and very reserved, yet the conclusion by the experts from America and Europe who studied thnic make-up and attitudes say they are one of the more extroverted races of people on earth. Most people think of the Germans as industrious - wrong say the researchers, that stereotype no longer applies. Germans are no more industrious than any other European race. The Irish are viewed as ‘carefree and devil-may-care,’ - wrong they say. The Irish are one of the more industrious races in Europe with a complete balance of skills and work ethics. Americans have long been thought of as ‘showy’ and very assertive - wrong say the boffins! Americans and Canadians are very similar in image but are both more ‘reserved’ and ‘old fashioned’ than the English. You couldn’t get either race to change a thing about themselves or the way they do things. Their self-image is something they treasure and would not update. The races asserting themselves now and for many years to come the experts say are the Indians (India) and the Chinese. They’re assertive, intelligent, and are taking over a lot of the important skills this world needs. Stereotyping, the experts say, has been the cause of prejudice, discrimination, persecution, and in some countries genocide, and it is all so out of date. If it wasn’t for accent and colour we’d not be able to tell an Englishman from a German, an American from an Australian, or a Jew from a Spaniard, so get rid of those old ideas you have about 'racial make-up' and get into the 21st century they say!
HAROLD PINTER WINS THE NOBEL PRIZE FOR LITERATURE.
Harold Pinter, the 75 year old British playwright has won this years Nobel Prize for Literature. The prize is a $1.3 million cheque which, in truth, really goes against everything his plays have stood for. Pinter's plays were a type of abstract art, but in play form. Kitchen sink dramas that had a subliminal message. You watched his plays unfold like you'd stare at a painting of ducks flying upside down on a musical stave background. Squinting, putting ones head side to side, trying to figure out what the hidden message was, and more importantly, why it was hidden. But like all 'meaningful' plays and paintings some expert with a Ph.D and troublesome hair will tell you what it's all supposed to mean. This Nobel Prize to Pinter is so controversial that I've already received scores of emails about it. One person suggested - what next? George Bush getting the Nobel Peace prize!
JUNK FOOD IN BRITISH SCHOOLS IS TO BE JUNKED BY START OF SCHOOL IN SEPTEMBER 2006
As from September 2006 all schools in Britain will not be allowed to serve school meals that consist of: mass made mixed-beef beefburgers (hamburgers), and those weird and wonderful who-knows-whats-in-them - sausages! Without those two big wobble-bum makers French fries will give way to good old mashed potatoes. Vending machines will not be allowed to sell: crisps (chips) of any sort, constructed snacks like onion rings & pork rinds, along with all forms of nuts, and all chocolate products including the famous British chocolate ‘bicky.’ Health foods will fill the vending machines such as the incredibly unbelievably popular (take a number & queue up!) mixed dried fruit trail mixes, unsalted un-buttered popcorn, and those little bars of wonder and delight that taste like twigs, old oats, and bird seed. Fizzy pop drinks will go and be replaced by £1 bottles of water, real juices, and, wait for it - yoghurt. I can see our teenagers champing at the bit just waiting to pop in their pounds and grow so much healthier - until they get home, hit the 'fridge, and pig-out on pop, cake, chocolate, and crisps, or worse still flock to McDonald's on the way home and do justice to a Big Mac meal. Funding for school meals will go up, but so will packed lunches from home where mum and dad might allow for ham, luncheon meat, and bacon butties, and assorted leftover cakes and sweets!
THE IRA APPROVED CANADIAN GENERAL De CHASTELAIN SAYS ALL WEAPONS 'BEYOND USE' - AGAIN.
The Canadian General de Chastelain and two priests, one catholic and one ex-methodist (no Anglican?) approved before hand by the IRA to oversee weapons disposal, said in a public statement that, 'we have observed and varified EVENTS (?) that have put very large quantities of IRA arms [Regulars - NOT Real IRA] beyond use.' The General would not allow photos of the EVENTS (never, not, no-how & non non non!) to be taken and will not EVER reveal WHERE these EVENTS took place, (so there!) but the two IRA appointed priests agree with de Chastelain saying they 'witnessed' the 'beyond use' EVENTS - the last time the General said this same thing two years ago he got it wrong then. Hope he's right this time.
A NEW QUICK READ MUCH EDITED VERSION OF THE BIBLE IS LAUNCHED IN BRITAIN.
A new quick read version of the Bible has been introduced by the Rev. Michael Hinton and launched in the hallowed cloisters of Canterbury Cathedral. It can be read by the average reader in just under two hours - cover to cover. Not everything has be retained of course. The Old Testament is there but without all the ‘begats’ and such like. Out went The Song of Solomon, and only the two most popular psalms are retained. The first four books of the New Tertament are combined into one. Much of the ‘filler’ areas of the Bible such as The Laws are excluded, and St. Pauls epistles have been seriously edited, as has the Book of Ruth. Anyway, you’ll see what the Rev. Hinton left out when you read the real one again - as a local wag said at the presentation! Someone suggested at the presentation that there should be a CD, read perhaps by Michael Jackson, or Madonna, also a colour pop-up book, toy Jesus, Deciples & Mary plastic statues as giveaways at McDonald’s - collect all 14 to get a free ‘Big Mac Meal’, and a £10 off coupon if you buy a real Bible later. (Pssst - for those who might be easily offended (I won't mention who) the last three lines above are 'humour' or, 'humor' and are not actually real - think of Royal Canadian Air Farce or Red Green)
TWO BRITISH SOLDIERS ARE RESCUED FROM AN IRAQI JAIL IN TRUE HOLLYWOOD STYLE!
Two British soldiers who had infiltrated the Iraqi police in search of the many insurgents working within that police force had an exchange of gunfire with several they had weeded out, and killed one of them. The same Iraqi police promptly arrested the two undercover British soldiers (they were disguised to look like Islamic men) and threw them in jail. An insurgent faction within the Iraqi police moved the two soldiers to a house near Basra when negotiations for their release fell through. The two British soldiers had been handed over to the insurgents who wanted to dish out their own form of punishment. When Brigadier John Lorimer heard this he sent in the tanks and helicopters and rescued the men. It has now come to light that the Iraqi police force, needed by the US and the British to take over in Iraq, is indeed infiltrated with perhaps up to 20% insurgents, a fact that has been kept out of the media in the hope undercover soldiers like the two Brits could help deal with the problem. The Americans are believed to have upwards of 100 US and Iraqi 'agents' within the Iraqi police trying to weed out the insurgents.
SEVEN OUT OF EVERY ONE HUNDRED PEOPLE LIVING IN BRITAIN WERE NOT BORN THERE.
The British Institute of Immigration Research 2001 census reveals that since 1991 7.53% of the British population were not born in Britain. Immigrants coming into Britain to live and secure British citizenship are not all non-white as the following figures reveal. Those who came into Britain since 1991 and claimed British nationality are: Irish 494,850, followed by: India 466,416, Pakistan 320,767, Germany 262,276, Caribbean 254,740, USA 155,030, South Africa 140,201 and, Italy 107,002. Britain does have a non-white British population of 10.9% of which 98.8% are gainfully employed backing up Britain's low unemployment figure as being the lowest in Europe and considerably better than that of Canada and the US.
AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR ON THE RISE IN INNER-CITY BRITAIN.
Britain is seeing a fast rise in the number of crimes committed where aggressive behaviour is used. Personal injury tops the list particularly where gangs set upon a lone walker or school child. Beatings by youths on other similar aged youths are at the core of the rise and the reasons given by experts range from too much time on their hands to too much video game playing. Aggressive behaviour among adults is the next showing a big increase with fights outside clubs and pubs on the rise. Again the experts put it down to the obvious, being too much drink and too much TV influence. The third and more worrying aspect of this rise in aggressive behaviour is the inner-city racial mix. Beatings are directly related to racial tension, say the 'Committee on Aggressive Behaviour', due in part to the 'war' in Iraq where the 'rightful' white races are trying to put down the 'wrongful' non-white races. Add the slate of films and TV shows where flagrant aggression is part and parcel of the content, and you have a great deal of 'aggression related input' say the committee members.
NEW OLYMPIC BILL UPSETS THE SELLERS AND TRADERS WANTING TO CASH IN ON THE 2012 OLYMPICS.
In an effort to keep control of what has been termed, quote, ‘the most lucrative Olympics ever’ the British government is introducing a bill to stop the stealers, the shysters, the barrow-boys, or anyone else cashing in for free on all the products and all the millions of visitors that will flood into London in July 2012. London Heathrow, already the busiest airport in the world and the hub of most flights in and out of Europe will have, by 2012, about seven runways, and even London Transport might add another one or two Underground lines to add to its already worlds largest transit system. Along with all this goes a multitude of ways to make a quick pound or two, so the government will introduce a bill to limit and curb the selling and advertising of Olympic related products from T shirts to Y fronts! Apply now, they say, or park your barrow out of town! But the entrepreneurs have already seen the light that leads to a truckload of profits and are filing numerous applications to sell everything that says London, Great Britain, Olympics, and the yet to be unveiled 2012 London Olympic mascot.
EL INGLES HANGS UP HIS CLOAK
Frank Evans, aged 63, the well known and well loved English matador living in Spain has finally agreed to end his fight with the bulls after being told his knee can never be repaired properly. He began his career in 1966 in Spain and was given more fights over the years than any other matador - because they wanted him gored and gone! - but he hung on to end his career before a very appreciative audience on sunday August 14th - without killing his last bull. Olay! El Ingles.
THE IRA CALL IT QUITS AND WILL 'DUMP' ITS WEAPONS AND PURSUE A POLITICAL REUNIFICATION.
The IRA; the Irish Republican Army, have brought an end to their campaign of terror and will pursue the only route possible to a united Ireland, that of politics. They will ‘dump’ all their weapons (as they put it) and will call for all other more militant factions of the IRA, such as The Real IRA, to follow suit. If these promises are kept then the decision by Adams, McGuinness, and the IRA Army Council is indeed a turning point in the confrontation between a retained British Northern Ireland, and the Sinn Fein & IRA’s aim to unite all of Ireland. McGuinness travelled to the US capitol to have Bush advised (two days before the announcement proper) and Adams made his statement to the media the day after the US was told, from a hotel in Dublin. Blair and the British government were advised at the same time McGuinness was in the US but made mo statement until just before Adams officially told the world. There now follows a long and no doubt awkward process of arms ‘dumping’ which has yet to be organised into the public display it has to be. Many observers felt such a declaration was due after Adams was snubbed this year by Bush in Washington on St.Patrick’s Day, the first time ever. With the US losing faith with an armed and terrorist organisation such as the IRA, the Sinn Fein knew the Irish image in the US had to get back to its ‘favourite cousin’ status before it was totally undermined. Bush’s fight against terrorism made it clear several years ago that terrorism was terrorism even if it came from the beloved Irish in their fight for ‘freedom.’ The question most are now asking is - will politics work? Will Sinn Fein get Northern Ireland into the republic? We’ll wait and see.
LONDON WINS THE 2012 SUMMER OLYMPICS
After Moscow, New York, and Madrid were eliminated it was down to a vote between London and Paris. The IOC meeting in Singapore took their final vote, and the final count was London 54 - Paris 50. The scenes in the London camp were akin to celebrations the rocket scientists held recently when a deliberately aimed space module hit a fast moving asteroid - and, about as far out! Against all the recent odds (Ladbrokes made Paris odds-on favourite) London took the honours. Even Jacques Chirac half smiled a 'Good Luck' (in English!) on his way to Scotland for the G8. Why London? Why not. London is politically secure (a big factor), the new sporting facilities (most of Stratford in East London will be entirely rebuilt to house the Olympic events), and Londons special ability to get people around which includes the worlds biggest underground system, with more buses and taxis than any other major city, and enough hotels to take care of visitors. Note: London has seen 25 million visitors from abroad so far this year. Although Canadian TV news looks and sounds now as if Canada lost its own bid (it's their not so secret hope the French would win), or that the French themselves will now up their intake of red wine, I just gotta say, it feels damn good to win something worthwhile whilst the Brit bashers from Can to Oz look decidedly glum. If I survive until 2012 - I promise I'll be there! If I don't - I'll still be there! (The PUT-DOWNERS jibes come flowing in) CBC News Canada: - 'but it rains all summer long there doesn't it?" - CTV Canada news: 'that's probably all they'll win for the 2012 Olympics.' (I won't mention the Montreal Olympics where Canada didn't even win a bronze medal). ABC Australian News: 'Well I'd thought I'd seen it all Connor when England beat Australia in the World Cup, but this takes the cake.' NBC News (USA): 'Of course Sandy we do have a security problem in New York.' French TV: 'Sacre' bleu' or something like that!!!!
TWO TEMPORARY SPEED CAMERAS ON THE M4 NAB 22,000 SPEEDERS AND RAKE IN £1.2 MILLION.
NOT FAIR, cry the 'freedom to speed' morons. YOU'RE SPYING, cry the lead-foot loonies. But two temporary speed cameras at a road works on the M4 clocked just over 22,000 speeders in two months. The limit was dropped to 40 mph when it was revealed that speeding through road works has killed four road workers so far this year, but still, one driver was caught speeding on average every five minutes. The fine is £60, plus other fines when it is realised some drivers were already disqualified, in stolen vehicles, or drunk or possibly on drugs! Were any of these 22,000 drivers any of those that voted in a recent poll that the most important thing a motorist must do is use his turn signals properly! Yes, say an observing police squad, most of the speeders used their turn signals with religious politeness as they sped in and out and whilst overtaking! Thank goodness for that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE BATTLE OF TRAFALGAR CELEBRATED AT PORTSMOUTH BY 167 SHIPS FROM AROUND THE WORLD.
It was 200 years ago that Lord Nelson inflicted on the French a defeat that has changed the course of history. The English lost more than 7,000 men but the forces that opposed Nelson lost 37,000 men and every ship they put to sea to fight the British fleet. Celebrations were held in the last week of June this year with the largest ever gathering of ships from around the world, incuding Japan, China, Indonesia, India, Pakistan, the USA, Canada and a host of other countries. A fireworks display was held just off Portsmouth and over 250,000 people lined every vantage point to watch a display of fireworks that surpassed anything seen in Britain to date. See the links we have on our sister website: www.clubsaintgeorge.com that will advise you how to contact the various SEA BRITAIN 2005 websites so you can celebrate this great victory of ours and how British sea power still demands respect.
RISE SIR DEL - DAVID JASON TO BE KNIGHTED AND TERRY WOGAN IS A HONOURARY KNIGHT
As Delboy Trotter was delivering a dodgy load of no-name DVD players in his three-wheeler Reliant he heard on his mobile that he'd been 'listed.' Now this gave old Delboy a few moments of concern thinking London's Mafia (Irish IRA rejects) were after him. Buying a copy of The Sun he sees his picture all over the front page telling the world - 'Delboy To Be A Knight.' - A real one mind you, not like on that new website Club Saint George!! This gave our Delboy cum DCI Frost a good reason to go down the pub and buy the lads a round. By the way, another well known TV personallity, Terry Wogan, is also going to be Knighted - well Honourary that is, seeing as he's Irish born. Well done David Jason and Terry Wogan.
CANADA AXES ITS OATH OF ALLEGIANCE TO H.M. THE QUEEN - VERY VERY QUIETLY.
The Canadian parliament voted through a bill, (Bill C-25) to drop the use of the ‘Oath of Allegiance’ to H.M. The Queen , once required in numerous areas of government from police to the military. This is seen as a forerunner next year (2006) to table a government motion to sever all ties with the Monarchy making Canada a republic like Australia. The Union flag is not flown anymore at schools or at other public buildings and recent tours by members of the Royal family have been lucky to get a mention (page nine in a Nova Scotia newspaper recently - May 2005) in local newspapers. On TV news stations these tours are hardly mentioned and even then with tired looks, smirks, sniggers, and grins: watch Tony Parsons on Global TV News in Vancouver - anything British gets him in hysterics - perhaps because he's a born in Britain gay. Best we call it a day and let the Canadians continue their patronizing and apeing of all things American.
CANADA AXES ANOTHER HISTORICAL LINK TO THE QUEEN - AND JUST LIKE BEFORE - VERY VERY QUIETLY
On December 29th, 2004, during the Tsunami crisis, the Prime Minister of Canada Paul Martin signed into effect the removal of the Queen’s name on all diplomatic letters, replacing it with that of the Governor General. The announcement went out in a press release list of political ‘news items’ headed ‘Canada Updates Diplomatic Practice’ and no TV news company (CBC, CTV, GLOBAL) noticed it, or more likely, chose not to notice it. It was not reported by any TV news programme in Canada, or in any newspaper, which leads supporters of the Queen in Canada (52% was the last count) to wonder, was the omission by the media compliance, or just plain bad reporting. Both would fit like a glove. This follows the removal of the Oath of Allegiance (military, political, judicial) that was scrapped under bill C25 also very quietly in 2004, with that to, getting no press. Not only is Canada’s government corrupt, and hanging onto power by a thread, with TV news giving them assistance by keep endlessly telling the public 'we don't want another election right now.' (Canadians tired? - or is corrupt government acceptable now??) Canada also treats its people like children by telling them only those things they want them to know - and the reliable Liberal old-boys media falls right into line.
WE'LL SHOOT THEM BOTH FOR YOU OFFER IRA AS TWO IRA MEN ARE ARRESTED.
After the IRA denied they knew who killed Robert McCartney, with Sinn Fein also denying any 'knowledge whatsoever' (can't you just hear that N.I. accent) about the McCartney killing, both have revealed there were 'connections' in both camps to the recent arrest of two IRA/SinnFein members for the McCartney murder. The IRA said it had expelled three members 'months ago' and Sinn Fein said it had suspended seven members 'sometime ago' all, it is confirmed, as being 'involved' in the McCartney killing outside a pub in Belfast on 31st January 2005. The arrested men resided in Birmingham. The McCartney sisters drew worldwide attention to their brothers death by gaining an audience with the Pope and with Blair and George Bush. After the two arrested men were named the IRA offered to shoot them both (in keeping with their determined effort to bring peace to Ireland !!??) but the sisters politely declined.
THE QUEEN'S VISIT TO CANADA IS OVERSHADOWED BY A SHOWDOWN IN CANADA'S PARLIAMENT.
The Queen, under her see-through Canadian $1.49 plastic umbrella, (Oh Canada) braved the heavy rain in Saskatchewan at the same time as the Canadian Liberal government was staving off yet another attempt by the opposition Conservatives to get them out and force an election. The facts are more interesting than the Queen's visit. In the past 8 years the Liberal government has paid $600 million (six hundred million buckaroos) to Ad Agencies to manage the governments advertising - what little there was. Of this, great amounts were 'agreed' to be channeled back to the Liberals to support their last election and other government festivities. Even envelopes stuffed with money were exchanged in seedy restaurants in Ottawa in true Mafia fashion. But alas and alack, we're told the Canadian people do not want all the trouble on another election, so they voted to keep the currupt and fraudulent Liberals in power. Stay tuned - Canada has at last some interesting news to report :)
UK UNEMPLOYMENT FIGURES STAY BELOW 1.5 MILLION BEING THE LOWEST IN EUROPE.
The unemployed in Britain rose to 1.43 million last month (March 2005), being one of its highest figures in the last few years. It is still the lowest figure in Europe percentage-wise and headcount-wise, (except Ireland) and compares very favourably to Canada (1.5 million with half the UK population) and the US, which has a staggering 9.5 million (registered) unemployed. Germany has one of the worst unemployment rates in Europe with over 5 million unemployed. Interestingly, the upcoming UK election on May 5th has no agenda about the unemployed for any of the political parties, because there is always half a million unemployables, another half a million foreign speaking refugees, with the rest basically between jobs. The election does however focus on curbing immigration along with the usual issues of health and education.
UK GROCERY LIST COMPARISION TO THE TOP TEN BRIT DESTINATIONS:
The following groceries cost £14.95 in the UK (Feb 2005): Litre milk, jar of coffee, loaf of bread, dozen eggs, 2 lb sugar, 1 lb cheese, a lettuce, 2 lb apples, and a whole fresh chicken. How does the same list of groceries fare in countries where Brits are retiring to or where they now live as immigrants? According to The Prudential survey the cheapest is: South Africa £9.18, then NZ £11.95, Spain £12.75, USA £13.82, Italy £14.47, OZ £15.25, France £16.75, Canada £17.45, Greece £18.55, and tenth Cyrus £20.05. It is pointed out that you can make up all kinds of lists and add in the cost of cars, petrol, insurance, house purchase, acute medical, taxes, and other items we constantly are paying out for with the result this list can be completely turned upside down. Or you can say, okay, okay,okay... BUT, and add in all your own favourites to justify where you live now. Whatever way you slice up your list, South Africa, New Zealand, the USA and Australia are the most reasonably cost effective lifestyles, with France, Spain Canada, the UK, and Cyprus still the most expensive places to live - overall. (prices have obviously been converted from local currency to pounds)
UK SCHOOL KIDS ARE THE WORLDS WORST FOR DISCIPLINE.
The unruly and disruptive behaviour of school children in British schools has become an ‘epidemic’ and strong measures have to be taken before these unruly and spoilt children take over the system - so says Ruth Kelly, the UK Education Minister. British schools have long been recognized as among the worst for unruly and disruptive behavior as compared to schools in Europe, the Americas, and Australia. The cause is linked to the ‘society malfunctions’ within the British culture, whereby it allows such behavior as ‘soccer louts’ and ‘lager louts’ to exist in a progressive and intelligent society that Britain is recognized to be in all other respects. The ‘common’ and ‘yobbo’ elements of British society are not dealt with firmly, the experts say, because education, values, and ‘style’ has been allowed to be seriously ‘dumb-downed.’ The rest of the world is watching todays younger British society in witness to just what can happen when you take todays ‘disheveled look’ to its furthest extremes. Measures to combat this include CCTV in schools, and fines to parents.
NEW ZEALAND TO SCRAP PRESENT FLAG AND REPLACE IT WITH 'ALL BLACKS' & FERN.
There is strong support in New Zealand to scrap the present flag, often confused with the Australian flag, and replace it with a flag that has a black background (reference to the well known N.Z. All Blacks rugby team) and a silver fern across it. So many modern day New Zealanders want this change that a referendum will be held with the result almost gauranteed. They say the present flag smacks of a ‘British colony’ and that the ‘old British immigrant and British-minded New Zealanders’ are fast dying out.
BRITAIN GETS 625,000 NEW BRITS IN 2004 WHILE 222,000 USED ONES EMIGRATE!
USED BRITS: A total number of 222,000 Britons left Britain in 2004 to live abroad. The vast majority were retired Brits going to Europe, with a large number going to South Africa, where retirement properties can be bought for a lot less than in the UK, and their UK pensions can go a lot further. This figure does not of course include close to 120,000 Brits who left in 2004 to work abroad. The figure of exiting Brit emigrants is the highest in years, and is put down to several reasons. The most quoted reason given by exiting working family Brits is, that immigration into Britain by non-whites was the leading factor, which leads to urban crowding they say, plus work loss, and overcrowded inner-city schools. The places of choice that these exiting retired Brits are heading for is Spain and Portugal, South Africa, then France, Cyprus, Malta, and Italy. Of the emigrants from Britain the 'old Empire' countries such as Australia still sees more working class family Brits arriving downunder each year (7,474 individuals in 2004 - 6,663 in 2003)), just ahead of the US (3,092), New Zealand (1,101), then Canada (1,024), and lastly South Africa (665 emigrant Brits) - this is not including retired Brits.
NEW BRITS: Immigration into Britain totalled 625,000 in 2004, which includes all forms of immigrants from refugees to asylum seekers. These immigrants are in the main non-white and are all from so-called poorer countries. Britain now has a resident 18% non-white immigrant population, including families in the UK of non-whites. Of a total UK population of 60 million this represents 10.8 million, which are mostly (92%) settled into the larger inner-city areas. This UK ratio of non-white immigrant/resident to white resident is still much smaller than other countries, such as New Zealand 21% non-white, Canada 28%, Australia 29%, US 39%, and South Africa where 92% of the population are non-white. Source: Migrationwatch UK.
THE SCOTTISH REGIMENTS ARE TO UNITE INTO ONE BIG REGIMENT.
The announcement that all the Scottish regiments are to amalgamate into one 'super' regiment is sending shock waves through Scotland. The Royal Scots, Kings Own Scottish Borderers, Black Watch, Argyl & Sutherland Highlanders, Royal Highland Fuseliers, and The Highlanders, will all unite into one 'super' regiment called, 'The Royal Scottish Regiment' within five years. All will keep insignia & colours but one uniform, yet to be decided, will suit all. They will remain stationed in two of the main depots, with the other depots closing. One reason is the fading need in the world for major powers to have 'old style' troops. All military forces in the future will be in the UN type of roll.
BRITAIN IS BOOMING WITH TOURISTS YET AGAIN.
Britain, with the west country and London in particular, is booming with tourists. Hotel bookings are up 10% over last year, with a vacancy rate that fluctuates between 4% and 0%. Most tourists this summer are from Europe, with Germany and France in the forefront, followed by the Dutch, Japanese, Americans, and a surprisingly large number of exPats from Australia & New Zealand. A spokesman for the London Tourist Board said that whilst Britain, with London in particular, represents the more ‘expensive’ holiday destination, it draws of course those that come from similar high cost-of-living countries, but isn’t as attractive to tourists from the lower income cost-of-living countries such as Canada, Australia, most of South America, and the far east. Tourists are flocking to Britain’s many ‘Theme Parks’, such as 'The Eden Project,' the biggest tropical greenhouse complex in the world, as well as visiting the scores of world renown cities such as Liverpool, Manchester, Edinburgh, Glasgow, Brighton, Dover, and Torquay. Ferries to and from Belfast, Dublin, and across the channel to France, as well as to Jersey and the Isle of Man, are fully booked days in advance. The Channel Tunnel train is a great favourite to go to and from Paris. Country hotel retreats and cottage rentals are seeing a huge increase, which, the London Tourist Board spokesman says is a lot to do with the recent discovery by tourists that Britain is not the rain capitol of the world! London Heathrow remains the busiest airport terminal in the world, with London now being claimed as the financial centre of the world. (Updated May 2005))
ITV TRY TO KEEP PACE WITH THE BBC's WORLDWIDE POPULARITY
Television shows made by the BBC are the most successful TV shows exported by any country. Only the US exceeds Britain in TV exports, and only then collectively. The BBC is the single most popular TV corporation in the world - by far. This does not sit well with Britain’s other TV group, ITV. With hit shows of their own: ‘Coronation Street’ for one, seen daily around the world in 18 other countries, they are now going to revive some of their best. ‘Inspector Morse’ comes back with Lewis (Kevin Whately) made up to Inspector, and a new sidekick, yet to be selected. ‘Rumpole of the Bailey’ returns with my favourite Albert Finney in the role. ‘Miss Marple’ returns with that great actress, Geraldine McEwan in the lead. ITV even persuaded Honor Blackman (Pussy Galore of 007 fame) to do a dozen episodes on ‘Coronation Street’ to help increase its ratings. And she still looks great!
WHATS IN A NAME? YOU'LL BE VERY SURPRISED SAY UK RESEARCHERS.
What's in a name? An awful lot if you ask the researchers in the UK who recently came up with a list of childrens names that will help teachers deal a lot better with their pupils, by simply knowing what is behind the names given to todays often unruly and hyper children. The name says it all, they say! For instance, any child named Kyle or Kylie is often a right pain in the neck! Names, the researchers say, are extentions of the parents ego and reflect the mood, mind, and temperament of the parents that is then passed on to their children. Stand by, you might have a kid with one of the following names! As they said, watch out for the Kyles and Kylies, also those with 'fancy spelling' of their names like, Teena (Tina), Tami (Tammy) and Jimy (Jimmy). Next are the 'trendy' with-it, hot names such as, Aidan, Connor, Madison, Morgany, and Angel, all, they say are likely very spoilt, hyper-active kids, very demanding, and classroom disturbers! If kids come with names like Cheyenne, Destiny, Wildflower, Passion, Echo, Amber, Tiffany, Willow, Modesty and Treasure - look out, they say, these kids are most likely poor learners, self lovers, nose rings & face chain wearers, and very inattentive. Are there any good names? The researchers say yes. Kids with names like Elizabeth, Penelope, Megan, Emma, and Linda are usually well-behaved, as are Toms, Petes, Davids, Bills, and Freds! Good old fashioned names like Gladys, Mary, Ann, Winifred, George, Herbert, and Horace usually indicate solid, reliable kids with good work skills. Usually - there are many exceptions!
THE 'PLAYSTATION GENERATION' - ARE THEY AS DOPEY AS THEY LOOK?
The ‘new society’ of young adults dressing up to look like young childlike urchins has prompted researchers in Britain to come up with an ‘identikit of trust’ whereby employers can get beyond the hacked hairdos, the long hand-hiding sleeves, and the big bulky boots & trainers (runners) and seek out the real individual and find out if they’re suitable for a responsible job, or, they really are as dopey as they look. With the looks and attitudes as portrayed by the new ‘playstation generation’ there’s a danger some good people could be lost in the ‘look I’m walking funny’ shuffle. The ‘identikit’ suggests that women should attend interviews in suits (not pantsuits or jeans), without spiked hair, no nose rings, with those hand-hiding sweater sleeves a definite no-no!. For men a regional accent is now okay, slim build, white shirt, and real shoes! Oh yes, 'bouncy ball' word pronunciation is in - 'did-Dent,' (didn't) 'could-Dent, (couldn't) and 'gar-Den' (garden) etc etc.
now let's all sing this together, ready, one, two three:
"I did-dent promise you a rose gar-den in Tot-Ten-Ham"
NO-SHOW AT SCHOOL WILL COST PARENTS £100 TRUANCY FINE.
As part of the new Anti-Social Behaviour Act parents of children who fail to attend school on a regular basis will be levied a £100 fine. The fine can be administered by the police, education officers, or school headmasters. Although truancy rates in the U.K. are nowhere as near as high as they are in Canada or the U.S., where they reach 20% in some areas, the new laws to combat no-shows at school are more a deterrent than an expectation of taking in vast amounts of money. 'One fine should do it' says a leading education critic.
NO MORE USING THE UK HEALTH SYSTEM IF YOU HAVEN'T GOT A UK PASSPORT.
You cannot use (or abuse) the UK National Health Service anymore unless you have a valid UK passport. Producing that old social security card, or number you had when you quit Britain will no longer suffice. The new law is going into effect mainly to stop un-registered immigrants to Britain using the health system before they're eligible. It'll also stop tourists from the US, Canada, and Europe who often get dental work done at a lot less than in their own countries, like teeth braces. But mostly it'll stop the thousands of ex-Brits who emigrated years ago from abusing the National Health Service when they travel home on holiday. A lot of these Brits have nothing good to say about Britain but will go home and abuse the UK's world class health system. Not anymore. Show your valid UK passport (valid as dual citizenship in Canada & Australia by the way) but don't produce your old one! If not you'll now either pay up front or use your health insurance you bought before you left for your holiday. 2005 update: We're told by numerous hospitals that exBrits from all over the world are STILL trying their best to get FREE hospital treatment - even those who say they are religious, God fearing, have high moral standards, and walk prissy-toed back in their own immigrant countries. Shove it to olde England eh - you shysters. Stay where you are, and get your new adored country to fix your ills. After all you got them there.
AGAINST THE LAW TO USE YOUR MOBILE/CELL PHONE WHILST DRIVING.
As from December 1st it will be an offence to drive your vehicle in Britain whilst holding a mobile (cell) phone to your ear. If caught the fine will be £30 the first time. If they have to drag you into court to pay the fine (no more 'human rights' arguments please!) they'll be able to increase the fine to £1,000. Over 90% agree that driving with one hand whilst talking on the mobile is indeed dangerous and the practice is illegal in over 30 countries. The amount of accidents caused by mobiles in one hand is rising rapidly and closing in on the top cause of accidents - speed, and the second cause - careless driving. (Imagine this law throughout North America!)
LONDON TOP FOR SHOPS.
The influential U.S. magazine Forbes has placed London as the best place in the world to shop. It listed 24 categories and London came out tops in seven. They are: Harrods for food, Berry Bros & Rudd for wine, General Trading Co., for home design, Andersen & Sheppard for clothes, Lobb for shoes, JJ Fox and, Robert Lewis, both, for tobacco products. London was placed second for toys: Hamleys, for books: Foyles, and for gourmet retailer: Fortnum & Mason. In the overall voting London was tops, New York second, Paris third, with Milan fourth, the latter two getting the nod for fashions.
FEMALE CANADIAN "JOURNALIST" IS DOWN ON ALL BRITISH MEN!
Leah McLaren, a very young, first time writer, with a column in one of Canada's dailies, the liberal supporting Globe & Mail, has come out firing both barrels at British men based on a short visit to Britain and on snidey inuendo she hears among her few friends. She says in her column that they are ALL closet homosexuals and that know nothing about taking a woman out on a date. They're either effeminate or gross, under-attentative or over-attentative, lack conversational skills and are altogether so far behind U.S. males in the dating game that they should all take lessons from the U.S. male as seen in movies. Oh dear - why do Canadians think that America is all about what they see of it on TV and in the movies? And why do young untalented writers like her pick up on talk show humour and think it's for real. Are all Canadians lumberjacks, who grunt, and say 'eh' at the end of every sentence?? Of course not. Come on dear - get your finger out. I think Leah you should start taking lessons in fact, not fiction, and perhaps go back to working at that job where they gave you a 'paper' hat, not a 'newspaper' column.
Ken Seymour. Ed/Pub
We had similar crap being taught by a professor of psychology at the University Of British Columbia, in Vancouver, name of Susan Butt. Can you imagine the 'fall-out' if she had similar racial views about the Jews, or Americans, and expressed them as she does her bigotry about the Brits? Why are some of these self-important Ph.D's so insensitive, ignorant & offensive?? I wonder where she got her Ph.D. - in a box of Crackerjack?
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