Why I'm Going Home. Because we are deffinitely English, and very proud of that heritage, and living here in Canada we have been sneered at, laughed at, completely misunderstood, and at times faced some of the worst racism anyone could come up against. To watch TV and see a news anchor laugh as he says 'they still have gaslight in London you know.' To watch Ellen Degeneress on her TV show ask an actress who has just spent two years in Britain, 'but do they have toilets there.' (chuckle, chuckle, chuckle they all went). Even Oprah (my wife watches all these shows - not me!) found it hard to admit that there are worthwhile authors other than J.K.Rowling writing books in Britain. And chefs and cooks on TV cook shows going into hysterics because the British use white pepper. There is a childish and very misleading attitude portrayed by scores of well known people on TV that pour scorn and laughter on most things Britain stands for. No worthwhile Briton could possible take these endless swipes at our culture and not be pissed off.

Why I'm Going Home. Because here in Calgary it's all a sort-of cowboy culture with cowboy hats and cowboy ways, even when my dad went to the Legion. In Canadian Legions they can strut around with their big ten gallon hats on, scoffing at the Queen when it comes to showing her respect. 'We don't have to' a cowboy-type said to my dad, pushing a finger into his chest. And there's that 'we're not like Americans' attitude that is so far from the truth. Visit Calgary and you'd think you were in a Texas town, but you're not supposed to refer to Canadians being anything like Americans. One Calgarian, upset on TV about the British using some military base in northern Alberta for training, said, in a very spiteful tone, 'if it wasn't for the damn limeys we'd all be better off.' His interviewer smirked.

Why I'm Going Home. Because I like certain foods and can't get them here. I like my English kind of tea, my English bacon (gammon, full-rasher back), my English sausages, pickles, sauces, and lots more things, and can't get them here. I love a good curry, but mention curry to the average Canadian and they stick a finger down their throat in a gesture of being sick. Their hatred of Indians; Sikh, Hindu, Muslim, etc borders on a racial hatred that outsiders should take note of. You're just not welcome in Canada if you're a proud Brit, a proud Indian (which they call East-Indian), or, an outspoken observer of their very flawed society. One of my children has a slight asthma problem and we were amazed to find the central heating throughout Canada is forced hot air, about the worse thing anyone with asthma should have to live with. In some houses we visited over the long winter here in Calgary the people are all ashen faced, always tired, and complain about every possible ill under the sun. But get them to change from forced hot air to plug in radiators, or similar, brings arguments about cost. Yet the latter is cheaper and much much healthier.

Why I'm Going Home. Because the schooling here for our two children is, simply put, totally inadequate. Since we came here just over three years ago their standard of education has dropped. All these last few years have been spent re-learning most of what they had already been taught in Britain, with very little advancement in the more useful basics. They actually teach no British history at all, yet Canada is steeped in British history, from discovery, emigration, and industry. The only thing my son was taught was that Britain did not win anything for their honour at Waterloo: that Britain is a country that 'hovers close to collapse', and, Britain has the Americans to thank for their very survival. And all this taught with arrogant sneers and smirks. Why? My children have years to go yet before they finish their academic training here, then going out into the world with a sub-standard knowledge of the English language, of mathematics, and world affairs, except what goes on in the U.S. - which is the main history taught in their grouped subject, called 'Social Studies.'

Why I'm Going Home. Because we simply don't like the winters. We find the country too big, too much of the same. A trip to Toronto, then to Winnipeg, and back here to Calgary was like seeing the same thing over and over again. We found the people friendly at first, but in a 'have a nice day' way that didn't go beyond the surface. Humour here is...well how can I put it...non-existent. There are no humorous TV shows made by Canadians, other than old fashioned farce that borders on shows made for toddlers. Where is the Canadian TV and film companies if this is such a great go-ahead dynamic country with a story to tell? Is there just nothing to Canadian society? Do all Canadians live for eating, shopping, watching U.S. TV, and quietly worshipping American culture?

Why I'm Going Home. Because I want to go fishing again on the quiet Yare river. Because I want to see Norwich play. Because I want to eat fish & chips on my way home late at night. Because I want to join friends for a good curry. Because I want four seasons, great sports, first class TV, and a great and proud history. Because I want to walk the pathways and the woods and the fields of one of the most beautiful counties in Britain. Because Canada is not a place where young, go-ahead, proud Brits are welcome. There is just too much missing here, and it doesn't compare to a society like that in Britain. Our kids want to go back. We want to go back. And we're going back. We'll stay with my dad in Norwich for awhile until we re-settle, and yes, I know, going back is tough. But staying here is tougher, and, no longer an option. And if you want to talk about it, or tell me I'm an idiot, or simply argue or even agree with me, then e.mail me at: BillnSandraHill@aol.com