|
*CLICK THE LITTLE GIRL, OR MY LETTER TO HEAR A SONG COMPOSED FOR US - DURING THE HEART OF THE BATTLE*
My Precious Daughter,
No matter what, I will always love you. No matter when, I will always be here. No matter how long it takes, I will be waiting for you.
My hope... is that one day you will know.. not just that I love you, but how much.
I know the toll this injustice has taken on you, and I want you to know that I felt your tears and hurt for your heart ache. I knew when you were hurting and crying for me, I felt it. I wanted nothing more then to be with you, hold you and rock you just like I always did.
I hope you understand that I did not choose to not be with you, for more then anything in the world with all my heart and soul I wanted to be right there with you, watching you grow up.
I hope that one day you will completely understand the full scope of what happened, and who the real culprits are. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think for one second that I would completely loose you, and have no contact with you at all, just because I chose to try to protect both of us by leaving someone that hurt us. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine that you would grow to hate me for my forced absense in your life. I understand that part of your emotions are a coping mechanism for what environment you are forced to endure at the moment. It's ok, I understand.
My regret... and my mistake is that I believed in our justice system. I wish I would have listened to your Grandpa, and if I could go back and change things, knowing what I now know, I would have taken you and run when you asked me too. If there is another mother in the world going thru this, and she wants my advise, it is to take your child and run. The justice system does not work.
I know a life on the run is not a good one, but I'm sure it's a darned site better then what we have now, which is nothing. I'm sure a parent could sleep better at night, knowing their child is safe from someone that chooses to hurt them.
My hope, my daughter, is that you will see how hard I fought for you.. and one day I hope you will completely understand the full revalation of all that is said here.
All my Love ~ XOXO ~ Mommy
October 2005
Hello ******,
I am sure you don’t remember me.
I am your Aunt Debi.
I was around you for several years
when you were little before you went to live with your Father.
I just want you to know that you have not been forgotten not for one second.
You have always been in our thoughts & our prayers.
I am your Mother’s older sister, I have 2 boy’s, Lonny & Justin they are your cousins.
Someday you will meet them & I again.
I have been temporarily staying out here at your Moms home & sleeping in your room.
She has always had a room for you waiting for your return.
I just wanted you to know that I am truly sorry you never got a chance
to really know who your Mom really is & how much she really Loves & misses you !
Your mom has never been the same since the day your Dad paid a lot of money
for someone to tell lies against your mother in court that day she was ordered by the judge
to give you to him.
I know this because I was there & when I asked the guy how much he was paid to lie,
he screamed & hollered that he was being attacked & I was asked to leave the courthouse.
Your Grandmother was there too !
One thing your Grandmother wanted more than anything
before she passed away was to see you again.
You & your mother use to live with your Grandmother
& Uncle Sean in Cobble Court Apts years ago.
Amelia, I just want you to know that your Mother
has never stopped trying to fight the courts for you,
she even spent some time in jail over all of this B.S.
It’s like this if you got the cash to pay people off to lie for you & stuff
you can usually get away with almost anything.
We are just your average typical family.
We work hard for what we got.
The only thing we have been missing all these years is you.
Love you always & forever in our prayers
Aunt Debi
Cousins Lonny & Justin & your Mommy too !
PS
Sorry for sloppy writing I have a bad shoulder doesn’t allow me to write so good anymore.
MISS YOU
Letters from my daughter
Tue, 27 May 2003
Dear Mom,
Thank you for that letter. That means a lot to me. I wish we could see each other, then, I would be so happy!! I really want to see you. I wish that you and I could do girly stuff, I will send you a pic of me. I wanted to Thank you, for being so nice to me. I am happy about that, and I wanted to tell you, that, I wish I could be in the hot tub with you! I have always wanted that. I love hot tubs. Thank you for always being here for me. You know, I wish you were around, because on Mother's day, I cry and cry, because I don't have a mother to spend it with. I want to set up a time with you, to meet each other on the internet? We should do that a lot, that way, I need to speak to you about something, I mean, get some advice from you. I want to print out every e-mail we send each other, that way, I would get to look back, and think about you. Every day, I pray for you, that you will have a super day! We should set up a supervised visitation, (stupid court orders), I get paid allowance, I could save, does that sound good to you? We can go to the mall, and the "supervised visitor" will be ignored at all times! :-) How about that mom? Because I really want to see you. I could save all my allowance, and, I could ask for a raise, so, I could get the amount quickly, but, promise me one thing, if we do it, it has to be just you and me, no other relative, because I have not seen you in about 8 years and, I want to catch up, and get in touch with you.
Love You With All Of My Heart,
Your Daughter
*******************************************************************************
After this letter, I attempted to contact the GAL via phone. After leaving a few messages he called back and left a message on my voice mail. I again left a few messages and he finally called me back. I spoke with him on Wed. May 28th. He agreed to a supervisor that does not charge, namely my sister. He said he would contact my x and return my call by the end of the week. He never returned the call. Today is Wed June 4 and I have yet to hear from him. In the mean time, my daughter sent me another note;
| Date : |
|
| Wed, 4 Jun 2003 02:54:25 EDT | |
Mom,
What happend to the supervised visit thing? I was excited. What happend??
Your Daughter,
It is a little frustrating to try to co-ordinate this while my x is most likely avoiding calls from the GAL, all the while putting this all back on me to try to taint my daughter's view on her mother. What these idiots don't realize is their parents, regardless of what anyone thinks about us, is a part of our child. And to try to make one look bad to the child only hurts the child. When they are older, they'll figure this all out on their own, but in the mean time, I sure wish some folks would grow up and stop trying to hurt the child by bashing the other to make themselves feel "big and powerful".
*******************************************************************************
6/17/2003
4-weeks have now passed since the initial request to visit my daughter was made.
Every week when I phone the GAL, he tells me that he will call me back towards the end of the week, yet my phone never rings. He has told me that he is having a problem contacting my x (and he seemed genuinely frustrated {in my ex.'s obvious ploy}).
In the mean time, my x has blocked my daughter and I from communicating.... Again....
I suspect this is due to her anticipation to visit me. He's always felt threatened by the fact that my daughter and I have been very close.... Sigh!
*******************************************************************************
6/25/2003
I just got a call back from GAL, he finally got in touch with my x, and now a visit is scheduled this coming Saturday (6/28) @ 10 am - in the GAL's office with a paid supervisor who works out of the GAL's office, who agreed to do this one "for free".
What is interesting to me, is you must take into consideration the date of the above letter my daughter wrote to me, wherein she states that she wants to see me, which in part prompted me to phone the GAL.
Directly following the GAL's first call to my x, I was blocked from sending my daughter any further emails, and she has likewise not written to me. Four (4) weeks have now passed. In that time, my x has had sufficient time to "brainwash" my kid more, until she has completely changed her tune, and I'm told now that she cried on the phone to the GAL and begged him not to visit me. Quite interesting indeed. She told him that she must say those "nice" type of things to me, because if she does not, then I will be mean to her and call her names. I find this very interesting indeed....
I am excited to finally get to see my daughter, but at the same time I am equally apprehensive of engaging in these visits, given the horse puckey that began 4 weeks ago. As a mother, I obviously Love my child, and I want to see her, and be a part of her life, but at the same time I am dreading the emotional roller coaster this brings....
*******************************************************************************
7/1/03
Well, I had my visit. It was ok. My former step-daughter was there. My daughter sat in the corner behind the table and my step daughter sat between Amelia and the rest of the room.
I was saddened at how stone cold my daughter was, like a robot with absolutely no emotions. I decided I would bring her baby boxes as thru the years I learned she had many questions about her baby things. When I brought them out, her expression never changed. We went thru her stuff, and after I packed her things back up, my former stepdaughter left the room stating that she had to go to work.
I then sat in the chair next to my daughter, and I asked her for a hug. She looked at me with that blank expression still on her face. I told her that I was not going to make her hug me, but if she wanted to, then she could. I then grabbed a box of craft beads I brought to the visit. We began to make something, and she opened up with a bunch of generic chit chat and out of the blue she said "I want to hug you". We did, and she held on for a few minutes. I was really touched, because I had waited SO LONG for this moment. I was trying real hard to have no emotions because we are not allowed to be human beings in the eyes of the court. My daughter saw my tears and tried to ask me if I was crying. I changed the subject and started to point her towards the box of beads as I blinked my tears away and bit my tongue to bring my emotions back in check.
About 20 minutes following my step daughter's departure, my daughter abruptly had to leave as though she were summoned by someone in the hallway. This time she came up to me willingly and hugged me a second time.
*******************************************************************************
I have recently had a conversation with my daughter. During the call, my x - Mark Inderbitzin, got onto the phone and said as loud as he could in front of her "you abandoned her - she cried and cried for you when she was younger and now she hates you because you abandoned her" - projecting the blame for his own evil deeds onto me. I asked him why he blocked me from talking with her, and why he blocked my letters and presents. He just laughed and gloated as he told me that I was a "shitty mother". Following this conversation, my daughter is angry with me because "I abandoned her". That statement is so far from the truth it isn't even funny. How can a man be so hateful and evil to a child? I can understand him saying horrible things about me in her presence, as that is the caliber of man he is. What I fail to understand is how any human being can tell a child "your mother abandoned you" - how the hell does that make her feel? She already suffers with low self esteem, I can see that plain as day, so why would a abuser make this statement to a child? Is it to keep them down so the love and affection is openly received by him - wherein he can be viewed as the only one that really loves them - afterall mom abandoned you... SICK! -
I found the following letter written by a 12-year old child. I thought it was appropriate to place here...
*******************************************************************************
LETTER FROM AN ABUSED CHILD
No one can tell the story better than one of its victims
There is no better way to illustrate the way the child protectors treat the children in their care except to listen to the main victim, the child herself. When I saw this letter I knew I had to post it in the "Child Protector Watch" web site for all to see. I've helped her a very little bit where she had a problem with punctuation, and I split it up into more than the two paragraphs she used (she's only 12, after all), all to make it more readable. But that is the only editing I did. raythomas101@hotmail.com Sun, 12 Mar 2000 Here, right from her own pen, is Bobby Wilkes' plea:
A CHILD'S CRY FOR HELP, KEEP ME AWAY FROM MEAN PEOPLE
Hi my name is Bobbie Lynn Wilks. I will be 12 years old on April 16. I am a very happy child living with my mother now!!! I always want to be with my mom, brother, step dad (who is like a more dad than Gary Lynn Wilks!!). I lived with my Grandparents [dad's Mom & Step-Dad) for six years !! I did not see my Mom for three of those years!!! It was so hard & even harder for me to understand because I had a Great Mom always.
I did not even see my dad but maybe 1 hour a week if he could break away from his drinking pals. I was with his Mom and step dad that abused me all those years! I was pushed into a coffee table for asking about my Mom! Ever since that I get bad headaches. I think it's because of Rachel Turney pushing me into the coffee table!! I would cry my self to sleep at night!!! WANTING TO SEE MY MOM!!!! They would tell me if she loved me she would be calling me !!!! I saw the phone bills. She called me like twice a day! I knew deep in my heart that my Mom was out there somewhere fighting to get me back. My Mom loved me so much, and she was always a good Mom.
They told me she was a stripper ever since she was 15!! Thats a lie!!!! My Mom would never do that!!!! Rachel would always say Bad, bad things about my Mom. She once told me that is why I had to live with them, so I would not end up a Slut and pregnant at 15 like my Mom. Well, my Mom had my oldest sister at 21.
Rachel was so mean to me, and always said hurtful things to me to make me cry. I never felt like this was home. I did not belong there, & for sure did not want to be there. My Mom & I have a special bond no body can take away from us !!! I LOVE MY MOM!!! She is the best Mom ever! I cannot believe they would hold me back on something so special! They are the ones that don't love me. To do that itself is CRUEL! Very cruel to a little girl who wants her Mom. They (grandparents) try to act so innocent, that is a joke. I have seen them so drunk they could not talk. I have had to take Rachel aspirins in the mornings. I have great friends family and everything I ever wished for down here!! I'm so Happy, I have a Great Step-Dad. I wished I could call him mine, because he is always here for me & my brother & cousins.
He rides bikes, we play games like UNO, Battleship, Trouble & Sorry. My brother Joey is the best. We go swimming with Mom, and to the movies. I can't express how Happy, and Loved I am here. I now feel like I'm Home. This is a HOME & not just a house of abuse. My Mom & Step-Dad and many others worked so hard to get me here. Now I feel like I can truly be a person & a Kid again. With Rachel I could not. I was so sad.
I want to get my very own Lawyer to make sure these people do not EVER get me back. Because they are trying again and I'm very scared. I wish I NEVER had to even see them, they scare me, because they tell so many lies, and they are so cruel to do the things they did to me. I want to divorce them & my real dad. My real dad is no kind of dad. He was NEVER THERE. I was lucky to even see him at all in a week. I could always tell if something was coming up in court because he would come around more, but only then. He told me a Christmas I had to come & stay with my grandparents because he did not have time for me. So I did not go.
I DO NOT WANT TO EVER SEE THEM PEOPLE AGAIN IN MY LIFE. I'M PLEADING FOR HELP TO GET MY OWN LAWYER AND GIVE ME A VOICE IN WHAT I WANT FOR A CHANGE. NO ONE SEEMS TO LISTEN. THIS IS MY LIFE, NOT THEIRS. Please help me. I will not stop till I'm heard. If I have to go back, I will run away, again & again. Why should I live with someone like that, when My Home here is GREAT, My Mom, Dad, brother and all my family Love me so much. There is a Law named after me in TENNESSEE called The Bobbie Lynn Wilks Law- SB2719. It protects children from ABUSE, But when the Judges won't listen what good is it? My Mom has been on TV Shows to plead for help, and I got to be on one in January of this year. It was great. A homecoming show for me. Little did I know that I would have to face going back to ABUSERS. PLEASE HELP & HEAR MY VOICE.
Respectfully Always,
Bobbie Lynn Wills 727-781-0218
Palm Harbor, Florida 34683
|
